heather apple is a writer

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Jury Duty

I have jury duty on January 27 and for the first time ever, I can actually go. Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about juries from television. Specifically from 30 Rock.

And I’ve developed a prejudice towards men, women, children, blacks, whites, asians, people from Ohio, all religions, most animals and three types of fruit.

Wait, am I under oath?